Undead Goodbye

I walk in darkness

It’s crushing weight like earth enveloping a tomb

No escape from the gloom

None that I could take

Least not while I clung

To a shred of hope

That all is not lost

I reach out for my creator

Calling in vain

To a father never met

The only answer I suffer

Is silence

Nowhere to be found

My only proof he is real

I exist

A desire that cannot be slaked

His gift to me

Others tell me of his being

Their proof

They exist

For without a start

There can be no end

I can never walk the light

So many enjoy

Taking for granted

Their good fortune

As blessed to walk in radiance

While I and others

Are cursed to walk the murk

I long to feel the warmth of light

Comfort me like a mother’s hug

Resignation that it’s not to be settles in

A terrible state

My fellow dark walkers

Content to accept

That which has been granted

I can’t

I rage at my misfortune

Cursing the creator’s absence

Answers I seek

None to be found

The very thing I yearn for

Could be my demise

My birth sire abandoned me

At my tender age of two

His own hand took him away

My maker is no better

Ignoring pleas for truth

I’m left to flounder, a ship on rough seas

If my flesh father could see

What has become of his blood

Would he weep in disappointment?

Would he accept what I am?

I’m never to know

Only to guess

That he might be stoic and stern

And turn his back to my plight

Yet still I hoped for better days

That are not to come

The burden is weighty

It wears me down

Each time I wake

I’m sad for that truth

And curse, curse, curse the maker

If abandonment was the plan

Why create?

If guidance was to be denied

Why pluck from the light and plunge into dark?

Would edifying not be preferred

To the claim of free will?

Colorless days are the best I can hope

With the darkness held back

And the pure lightness too

I can glimpse what I crave

And almost partake

What long has been denied

I feel hunger creeping in

Detesting  those in the light

I seek retribution on them

Though the fault is not theirs

For the way that I am

I can only feel well again

When they fall like I have

Their ruin

My only form of joy

Yet to be such is wrong

I’ve grappled with this

Knowing their harm, can’t change my condition

There is only one fix

For the state I am in

To walk in the light

To feel it’s beautiful burning warmth

I’m resigned in my direction

The path is clear

To end this brutal agony

That has become my life

I must give myself over

To that which I crave

Let the light take me

With all its searing glory

Even now as the darkness

Starts giving way

I wonder

If I’ve the strength

That my sire once mustered

Can I sit here until

The pain subsides?

Yes

Let sweet immortality truly begin